


Time to Heal

by Tealightful429



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Anxiety, Depression, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Magic, Recovery, Slice of Life, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-06-22 00:51:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15570123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tealightful429/pseuds/Tealightful429
Summary: All wounds take time to heal. Stardew Valley has been on a slow decline for a few years now and is in desperate need of help to restore it to its former glory. Former big-city loner, Ellie, has issues of her own that she hopes to mend with a fresh start at her grandfather's farm. Cute slice-of-life where bonds are made, secrets are discovered, and Ellie herself finds a bit of magic everywhere she looks, particularly in the basement of her neighbor to the north.





	1. Home Sweet Home

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! This is my first Stardew Valley story and the first bit of any writing I've done in a long time, so bear with me! I'm not sure how many chapters this will have, but my goal is to post once a week until we reach the end! I'll post warnings of new ratings as they come, but as of right now everything is fairly PG.

If Ellie had looked out of the window on the bus, she would have seen a sickeningly clear sky with fluffs of white clouds floating lazily beneath the springtime sunlight. Instead, her eyes were focused down into her lap at her phone as she reread the last message sent by her mother.

**I still don’t know y youre doing this. But since youre there, say hi to Lewis for me. Dont forget to call me sometime. Your doctor and I r worried about you.**

A forceful huff escaped her lips before she closed the message and watched her reception bars disappear one at a time as the bus rolled into Stardew Valley. Ellie stood up as soon as the bus stopped moving in hopes of getting the feeling back in her legs before she descended the stairs and was met by…no one. Ellie stood dumbly in front of the bus as the driver climbed down from his seat and retrieved her bags from the undercarriage. 

“Waiting for someone?” he asked with a tired lilt to his voice. Ellie said nothing, her eyes scanning the bus stop for any sign of life. She sent a letter to the mayor announcing her arrival and he had promised to meet her, but the man named Lewis and his mustache were nowhere to be found.

“I guess not,” Ellie finally answered as her bags hit the ground next to her with a ‘thud.’ 

“Bus doesn’t come this way too often, but you can always get ahold of me if you decide to change your mind. The Valley hasn’t been looking too good the past few years.” Ellie ignored the foreboding tone of the driver’s voice and put on her best customer service smile.

 “Anything is better than being stuck in the city. I’m not much of a people person.” The driver looked to have taken it as an insult to his attempt at conversation, shrugging his shoulders and muttering a “suit yourself” before climbing back onto the bus and closing the doors before puttering off into the distance. The thick exhaust fumes pulled Ellie out of whatever trance she put herself in, grabbing her bags and heading down the path where she last remembered her grandfather’s house being.

 Despite not being back in Stardew Valley for nearly 15 years since her grandfather passed, Ellie’s feet carried her with a confidence she only wished she could emulate in the rest of her anxious demeanor. 

“Elizabeth? Is that you?” Mayor Lewis waved hesitantly from the porch of her grandfather’s house looking exactly the same as Ellie had remembered.

“Hello, Lewis!” she called, a wave of relief washing over her as she picked up her pace. As she reached the house, Lewis came down to meet her and put two heavy hands on her shoulders as the corners of his eyes creased as he smiled warmly.

“Look at you, you’re a young woman now. Last time I saw you, you were just a little thing. How’s your mom?”

“She’s good. She got a job travelling around so she’s pretty busy. She says hello, by the way. She keeps meaning to make it out here.” Lewis nodded knowingly in the way people do when they make empty promises to reunite but never quite make it a reality.

“I’m sure with you here she might make it back before too long.” A long pause hung in the air only to be broken by the slamming of the front door. 

“I thought I heard voices out here! Welcome! Elizabeth, right? My name is Robin. It’s nice to finally meet you!” Before Ellie could think twice, Robin’s hands warm, callused hands swallowed her own. 

“It’s nice to meet you, too. Please, call me Ellie.” Robin released her hands and flashed a warm smile.

“Ellie, then. As I’m sure you know, it’s been quite some time since anyone’s lived in your grandfather’s cabin, so I hope I managed to take care of everything so you can be comfortable. It’s so nice to have a new face in the Valley; I hope you’ll feel welcomed here. If you get some free time, everyone is excited to meet you. Head down the road there and you’ll run right into the Stardrop Saloon. My husband Demetrius and I go there on Fridays if you ever want to say hello! Oh! Which reminds me!” Robin spoke a mile a minute and left Ellie slightly dazed as she watched her scurry about the porch hunting down the last of her tools. “I also happen to be the carpenter around here, so if you ever need a renovation or a chicken coop, come let me know! I promise to give you a fair price.”

“Don’t pay her too much mind, Ellie, she just wants your money,” Lewis said with a lighthearted chuckle. Robin shot him _the_ look and Ellie could tell that she was definitely somebody’s mother.

“We’ll leave you alone to get settled in, but don’t forget to try to wander out and get to known the town, alright?” Lewis’ comment caused Robin to finally stop moving and give Ellie a strong hug.

“We’re happy to have you here, Ellie. Please don’t be a stranger, alright? We’re all a family here and want to see you do well.” Ellie smiled, returning the hug with one arm still clutching onto one of her bags.

“Thank you for all the work you’ve done. It looks great,” Ellie said quietly, still overwhelmed with all the the commotion going on around her.

“It was no trouble! If you really want to make it up to me, come over for dinner sometime, okay?” Ellie nodded with a grateful smile. With that, Robin and Lewis headed back down the path to their respective homes and Ellie suddenly felt very alone. Ignoring the anxiety bubbling up in her chest, Ellie grabbed her bags and headed inside.

“Home sweet home,” she said to herself as she stepped inside. Robin had done a wonderful job restoring her grandfather’s home. The once worn wooden floors she ran around on as a child had been refinished and still smelled like fresh cedar. Simple wooden panels lined the walls with a few small windows sitting soundly in their frames. The furnishings looked to be new and handmade: a small table and chair, a stand that sat beneath an old-model TV, and a four-post bed topped with a plain white comforter and sheet set. Mentally noting to thank Robin again for her kindness, Ellie drug her bags in and began to unpack, mind wandering as she began to fill the small space with the handful of personal items she brought with her. It wasn’t until she had emptied her bags that she noticed that her eyes were only staying open from her sheer force of will. Changing and climbing into bed, she still couldn’t shake the lonely feeling that settled over the house.

“Home sweet home,” she said for the second time that evening, unsure if it was for the sake of remembrance or uncertainty.


	2. Headaches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ellie meets Alex. It goes just as well as you'd expect. She also meet Abigail. Which goes slightly better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote a few chapters before deciding to post them here, so no week-long wait for updates just yet. No warnings here, unless you hate bad first impressions.

Always the early riser, Ellie’s eyes fluttered open well before the distant call of roosters from south of her home an hour later. It took her a moment to remember where she was, but the silence that filled her ears as she looked around reminded her that she was alone. Alone in this mostly-unfamiliar house without the sounds of her mother milling about the house making breakfast and nagging her about the socks she had left in the hall. Not only that, she was also alone in the house without any food, as her grumbling stomach dutifully reminded her. As she wiped the sleep out of her eyes and pulled her thick head of curls back into a ponytail, she steeled herself for more social interaction than she usually cared for and headed down the road in search of some breakfast.

She walked with her head on a swivel, admiring the quaintness of her new home that stood in such a stark contrast to the cold cement of the city. Her eyes settled on a bird’s nest in a tree near the city center when a gridball ball hit her squarely in the back of the head, sending her flying forward towards the tree before she braced herself with her hands and fell to the ground, stars dancing behind her eyelids.

“Hey! Wow I’m real sorry about that, are you okay? Uh..” A guy appearing to be close to Ellie’s age came running up to her with a shocked and confused look on his face. To Ellie, he appeared to be a stereotypical high school jock: smooth, sunkissed skin covered with a letter jacket and fitted denim jeans, his obnoxiously chiseled jawline leading up to a headful of chestnut brown hair. She already didn’t like him.

“Ellie. And I’m fine, thanks.” The boy stammered, holding out his hand to help Ellie but while she ignored it and used the tree instead, dusting off her own pair of faded jeans and black t-shirt that were now specked with dirt and woodchips. Her curt introduction snapped him out of whatever sympathetic shock he was suffering from and a toothy, attractive smile reached his lips.

“I’m Alex. You must be the new farmer. Sorry again for the ball…I live pretty close, do you need some aspirin or anything? Some ice? I wasn’t paying attention and didn’t see you there, I swear.” Ellie’s stern look softened as she watched Alex’s smile fade a little and a nervous hand start to rub the back of his neck. _Be nice. This is a new place. A New start_.

“Actually, some aspirin sounds great. I haven’t eaten breakfast yet, but once I find some I’m sure it’ll help.” The friendlier response brought the smile back to Alex’s face as he flashed a thumbs up and jogged a few yards away to a small house on the corner and spoke to an elderly woman whose shawled arm directed him into the house. After he disappeared inside, the woman turned to Ellie and gave her a friendly smile and called her over.

“I hope you’re alright, sweetheart. You’ll have to forgive my grandson, he can be a bit overzealous at times, but he’s a sweet boy.”

“I’ll be alright, really. It’s just a bump,” Ellie responded as she fingered what would later become a very large bump on the back of her head. “It’s a shame to meet you like this, but I’m glad I ran into you. My name is Ellie,” she said, remembering her manners and holding out her hand that the old woman took after removing a thick pair of well-worn garden gloves. 

“My name is Evelyn, but you can just call me Granny. It’s so nice to see a new face in the Valley!” Granny seemed to be the perfect name for her. She stood at least half a foot beneath Ellie’s five foot two inches, clothes in a simple red housecoat and sturdy brown boots scuffed with dirt.

“I got it, I got it!” Alex called out as he came jogging hurriedly out of the house with a balled fist held high in the air. He came to an abrupt halt in front of Ellie and dropped two small white pills into her hand. “Sorry again…Ellie, right?” She nodded and gave him an appreciative smile, trying her best to paint Alex in a better light than the jocks she had known in the past.

“Thanks for these, I’m sure I’ll need them. You’ve got an arm on you.” Alex’s chest puffed out like a proud bird at the comment.

“I was a star gridball player back at school. I’m going to try out for the pros here soon, you watch!” Ellie couldn’t help but giggle at his excitement, her initial dislike easing up even more.

“Well, if you ever need a catch partner, let me know. Despite what you saw earlier I’m actually pretty good at it.” Alex let out a laugh.

“I’d ask you if you weren’t a girl.” The smile that had been on Ellie’s face froze in disbelief.

 “Oh. Well thanks again for the pills.” Without another word, Ellie spun on her heels and stalked off towards the first building she saw, absolutely fuming.

She was right the first time. She didn’t like him. Not at all.

 She didn’t stop until the door she rushed into closed with a heavy thud behind her. In front of her stood a stately wooden bar with a portly looking man standing behind the counter cleaning the inside of a glass.

 “Welcome! You the farmer everyone’s been buzzing about lately? It’s a bit early for a drink but you look like you could use a bite to eat. Name’s Gus, by the way.” Gus’ booming voice beat around Ellie’s chest like a drum and she immediately felt calmer and in the safe hands of someone who looked like they could make a mean egg sandwich by day and a dangerous cocktail by night.

“That’s me! I’m Ellie. And yeah, I’m starving, actually. I just met the other end of a stray gridball so I was hoping something would be open so I could take these.” Ellie held up the aspirin that were still in her hand. Gus’ belly bounced as he let out a hearty laugh and gave a sympathetic smile.

“Sounds like you met Alex. Don’t hold it against him, he’s a good kid.” Ellie held back an eye roll.

“That’s what I’ve been told.” Gus shrugged good-naturedly and flicked on a burner before grabbing a pan from a rack hanging above him. 

“You like eggs, kid?” 

“I like eggs!” A head of purple hair came through the door and, seeing Ellie, made a beeline towards her with her hand extended. 

“Hey! You must be the new farmer. I’m Abigail. Gotta be honest, we were a little bummed when we found out someone would be moving into the old farm. We had a good time running around the grounds out there.” Ellie envisioned a pint-sized purple haired girl lost in the forest of weeds that currently occupied most of the farmland and let out a small laugh.

“Sorry to ruin the fun. Who’s ‘we’?”

“Oh, Sam and Sebastian. They’re two good friends of mine. Have been for a long time.” Ellie nodded, trying to imagine two equally goth-chic men to match Abigail’s aesthetic. “Oh! That reminds me! Do you play tabletop games?”

“A few times but never enough to be called a serious player. Why?”

“Seb, Sam, and I usually play on Saturday nights. Wanna come? It’ll be great, I promise!” Anxiety knotted Ellie’s stomach and she took an unconscious step back.

“Sounds like fun. I’m still trying to get settled, but I’ll do my best to make it.” Abigail didn’t seem to notice the hesitancy in her voice as she bounced happily up to the bar where two plates of eggs and toast sat steaming. Ellie was thankful for the silence while they ate and she was quick to pay her tab, thank Gus for the meal, and head home to nurse her headache and get away from the now bustling town square until she was better prepared for awkward introductions for an entire towns worth of people.

Ellie was a little more grateful for the silence of her new home as she took the aspirin and laid down for a nap, setting an alarm to wake her up in time to make it back to the saloon to meet the rest of the Valley residents that let loose on a Friday night. For a few short hours, Ellie’s dreams were full of cocktails and gridballs.


	3. Pool Shark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cocktail in hand, Ellie meets the remaining members of the Three Musketeers and plays Sebastian in a game of pool in an attempt to get some free drinks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last pre-made chapter! I'll do my best to post beyond the once-a-week I promised, but ya girl has a day job. Slight mention of alcoholism and shitty exes. Hope you enjoy!

The phone on Ellie’s bedside table vibrated angrily onto the floor, causing Ellie to jump and awake from her nap in the most forceful way she could imagine. 

“Jesus Christ!” she shouted at no one as she fumbled to silence the alarm. It was 8 o’clock and from the dirt path that extended into town Ellie could see the soft glow of the saloon as it stood out against the sparse streetlights and the half-full moon. Opening the door, the scent of dark beer and pizza grease mixed with the chorus of voices put a smile on Ellie’s lips. 

“Ellie! You made it!” Ellie spotted Robin’s ponytail from where she sat near the door, a stoic but friendly-looking black man sitting across from her. “This is my husband, Demetrius,” she said, gesturing to the man who promptly stood up and grabbed Ellie’s hand. 

“Glad to finally meet you. Have you seen my daughter? She was excited to get to know you.” 

“I still haven’t met a lot of people yet, but I’ll make sure she’s at the top of my list!” Demetrious seemed pleased with her answer as he sat down again and helped himself to slice of the pizza sitting on the table between the pair. Hoping no one else caught her attention, Ellie made her way to the bar where Gus greeted her warmly before a blue-haired girl slid in front of her with excited energy.

“Heya, new girl! Welcome to the Valley! I’m Emily! I help run the bar around here. Can I get you anything?” Despite the slight startle, Ellie’s want for a drink overrode her nervousness to meet yet another new face. 

“I’m Ellie! Any house specialties? I’m not picky.”

“Gotcha covered, girly,” Gus’ voice came from behind Emily as he grabbed a bottle of whiskey and poured it into an empty glass with a flourish. A minute later a full glass of caramel-colored alcohol appeared in front of her that caused shudder to run up her spine. She was right about Gus; he had some serious skill behind that bar of his. Drink in hand and her cheeks already warm, Ellie got the courage to approach Abigail, who was lounging on a worn couch with her phone in her hand as two strangers were playing either a very serious or a very humorous game of pool, depending on which face she could see at the time.

“Ellie, hey! Come sit!” Abigail called out when she noticed Ellie creeping towards the couch. 

“I figured this would be the best way to meet everyone all at once. Guess I wasn’t wrong.” Behind them, it seemed like most of the town was occupying the saloon, drinks in hand and smiles on their faces. A lively, friendly bunch from the sounds of the loud conversation and laughter that muffled the jukebox in the corner.

“Oh hey, these are the other two musketeers. The one with black hair is Sebastian, and the other one getting his ass beat is Sam.” 

“Hey now, that’s hardly fair. I might win this one!” the one Abigail identified as Sam peered over his pool stick as he leaned into his shot and scratched the table, the white ball bouncing against the felt and rolling a measley 6 inches away. A smirk played on Ellie’s lips as she made her way over to him. 

“I don’t remember the last time I played pool…” Ellie said softly as she scanned the table with wide eyes. Sam’s opponent leaned lazily on his own stick with an amused but friendly smile. 

“Why don’t you play with him next game? Might do him some good to get more practice.” Sam glanced up at Sebastian and wrinkled his nose at him. 

“You’re going down,” he threatened as he stepped away from the table so Sebastian could take his turn. A confident ‘crack’ of the pool stick sent a solid red ball into the corner pocket in front of Sam, who stared at it sourly. Twenty minutes later and Sebastian had managed to clear the table while Sam’s 4 striped balls sat sadly on the felt. 

“Wanna try to play me instead?” Ellie offered to Sam, the glass in her hand now empty and her confidence in conversation slightly greater. 

“Don’t think I’ll go easy on you just because you’re new.” Ellie laughed and gave him a small smile. 

“Good.” With that, Sebastian handed Ellie his stick without looking directly at her. 

“Good luck,” he said quietly before going off to get another round of drinks for them, his confidence seeming to have left him without the shield of the game. 

Twenty more minutes had passed and Ellie had narrowly beaten Sam as her last ball fell into the nets below, leaving his two remaining balls on the table.

“Ooooh so close!” came Abigail’s voice from her spot on the couch. Sam stuck his tongue out at her with a good-natured grin. 

“You almost had me there at the end,” Ellie commented before turning her attention to Sebastian, who had been leaning against the far wall watching the game in silence. 

“Wanna play winner? I’ll bet you a round of drinks.” Sebastian’s ears perked up at the offer and cocked his head to the side. 

“I’d hate to take your money before you earn any on that farm of yours.” Ellie smiled brightly and handed Sam’s stick to Sebastian, who took it despite his thoughtful protest. 

“Humor me?” Ellie pleaded. With that, Sebastian set up the table again and gestured his hand to let Ellie break. She stared at the table for a moment before flexing her shoulders like a cat about to pounce, changing her stance and leaning threateningly into the shot. The cue ball hit the cluster with a thunderous crack and Sebastian, Sam, and Abigail stared dumbstruck as three solid-colored balls fell neatly into the nets below. 

“I’ve never been a whiskey girl myself, but whatever Gus made me earlier was the best drink I’ve had in a while. See if he can make it again for me?” Ellie eyes the three friends with a sly, mischievous look before she began to laugh and twirl the stick in her hand. 

“Pool shark? You totally played me!” Sam mocked tears as a silent Sebastian collected his thoughts and did his best to retaliate but scratched the table instead, clearly thrown off of his usual winning streak.

“Kick his ass, Ellie! Years of losing is all about to be worth it!” 

“Glad to know you’ve got my back, asshole.” Sam grinned widely in response and winked at Ellie. Four years of dating her shitbag ex-boyfriend seemed to be paying off in some small way. All those nights in the bars keeping herself occupied as he drank gave her quite the edge in pool and darts, sometimes being good enough to secure her free drinks for the night.  
As expected, a quick 10 minutes pass before Ellie emerged the winner, a surly Sebastian being a good enough sport to hand her her prize without complaint. 

“Thanks for humoring me. Sam was just so animated my heart went out to him.” 

“He’s not going to shut up about this for weeks, you know. But it’s nice to know I have a challenge waiting for me next time.” Ellie smiled before a yawn caught her by surprise and the effects of Gus’ cocktails fogged her thoughts. 

“Thanks you for letting me hang out with you guys. I had a really good time.” Sam threw his arm around her and smashed his cheek against hers in a rough hug. 

“A pleasure, m’lady. I hope we see you around sometime. Get off that farm and have some fun once in a while, alright? ANYTIME you want to beat the crap out of Seb you let me know, got it?” Ellie laughed and pulled herself away as she headed for the door. 

“I’ll do my best. You guys get home safe, okay?” Abigail bounced and waved goodbye before walking out and disappearing into the darkness towards her house. Sebastian’s quiet disposition she saw earlier returned as he gave her a small nod without moving from his spot a few feet behind Sam.

“I’ll see you guys around?” Ellie silently cursed herself for throwing herself into more social interactions but it was too late: Sam flashed her a smile and stuck his thumb out. 

“You betcha!” Ellie gave him another tired smile and returned Sebastian’s nod before heading out back home. With the rest of the town asleep, Ellie found herself jumping at every small sound as she hurried back home, her heart pounding in her ears. Like a child running upstairs away from invisible monsters that lurked in the darkness, she nearly ran into her front door before slipping inside and thumbing the lock closed before letting out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. 

Robin’s new windows must have been expertly insulated because crickets and rusting leaves that were deafening outside didn’t make a sound inside her house, the only noise become her bare footsteps as she crawled into bed. 

Maybe making new friends wouldn’t be as bad as she thought. It was certainly better than in the psychiatric unit she had called home just a few months before.


	4. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes nightmares that are based in reality are the scariest. But even so, they're only nightmares.  
> TRIGGER WARNINGS. PLEASE SEE CHAPTER NOTES.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNINGS: 
> 
> TOPICS OF SUICIDE AND SELF HARM IN THIS CHAPTER
> 
> Please be aware and skip if need be! This only serves as backstory and doesn't affect the plot in a way that won't be explained in less detail later. Mental health is important, friends <3 Read safe!

The nurse sat slouching in the uncomfortable plastic chair in front of Ellie and her mother, holding her clipboard out in front of her as she read.

“Do you have thoughts of suicide?”

“N-“

“ **Yes.”** Ellie’s mother’s response made Ellie’s own sound like a whisper. She turned to her with disbelief in her eyes but her mother made no attempt to look at her, an unblinking gaze fixed on the nurse.

“Have you ever attempted suicide?”

“N-“

 **“Yes.”** She answered again, louder this time. Ellie knew better than to fight and simply chose to sit on the examination table in silence. She picked at the dirt beneath her fingernails and flexed her legs closed as she tried not to shiver beneath the gown they had given her to change into.

“Ms. Martinez, I know you are very worried about your daughter, but since she is an adult, we need to speak with her alone.” The woman behind Ellie looked like she had been slapped. She said nothing but walked with heavy, high-heeled steps out of the exam room, closing the door behind her with enough force to echo around the small room.

“Are you and your mother close?” Ellie kept her head down but looked up at the nurse with emotionless eyes.

“Is that a question on your sheet?”

“No, but-“

“Then no comment.” The nurse was visibly taken aback by the comment, but continued with the rest of the questions. Ellie had noticed she was using a new questionnaire sheet.

“Well, Miss Martinez, you have two options. Since you’re an adult, you can check yourself out of here now if you wish, and return home. Or,” the nurse shifted in her chair, the plastic groaning in protest. “you can stay here for up to 72 hours under evaluation. You’ll have access to professionals who can advice you on how to proceed from there.”

When the doctors asked later, Ellie couldn’t recall her exact answer. She _did_ remember, however, when the security staff had to take her mother out of the waiting room and take her to her car while she tried to convince the nurse of all the ways Ellie could kill herself just with the things sitting around the waiting room and what a joke the hospital was, despite it being the only place her mother had said she would take her.

An hour passed and Ellie had been given a nondescript gray sweat suit and a pair of white socks that were too big for her, and a room with two beds but no roommate, much to her relief. Beneath a single blanket and trying to drown out the constant sounds of heart monitors, 72 hours felt like a lifetime.

After her second day, 72 hours would have felt like only a second.

The anxiety attack came at her like a hurricane: barely visible in the distance but a horribly destructive force once it reached her. She was what they called an “outpatient” and was granted special privileges, like time alone in her room with the door closed. It also allowed her to walk freely around the hospital floor, which was not much more than a large square with a nurse’s station in the center. The hurricane was  lapping at her heals as she walked silently around in her square, eyes flicking over to the nurse’s station every lap or so, curious as to what all they kept in there to keep sane while working with a bunch of crazy people.

On her 12th lap, she saw it: a small, pink, disposable razor that one of the nurses brought in to prepare for a date she had later that night. Patients on suicide watch were not allowed out without supervision, so she didn’t think twice about bringing it to work “just this once.” On lap 15, one nurse was checking on a patient down the hall, and the other made a promise with Ellie that she wouldn’t tell when she ran to the bathroom “just real quick.” On lap 16, the razor sat like a lead brick in the waistline of Ellie’s pants.

That little razor served as Ellie’s life vest as she rode out the hurricane in the only way she knew how. Without her mother there to walk in on her every couple of hours, the hurricane only subsided when Ellie fell unconscious in a pool of her own blood.

She woke up in one of the lower hospital floors, bandages on her left wrist and what felt like a mountain of gauze wrapped around her left thigh. As she wiggled the feeling back into her fingers, a plastic bracelet caught against the blankets. She lifted it up to read “SUICIDE WATCH” in fat, bold letters.

They extended her stay to 16 days. They were the longest days of her life.

A sickeningly fluid stream of 384 hours of foggy thoughts, slurred speech, doctors asking what sounded like different versions of the same questions, patients waking her up in the middle of the night screaming about everything and nothing, and the constant sound of sock-covered feet wandering around the square.

Adjustments in medication allowed Ellie to remember that the doctors kept telling her they thought this was an isolated incident brought on by some sort of trauma. What that trauma was not even Ellie was sure, but she had a feeling it had something to do with her mother, who was banned from visiting after 3 days of standing outside of the hospital threatening to call the police if they didn’t let her see her baby girl. Ellie wondered who she might be referring to.

Two days before her release, her mother was finally allowed upstairs. A nurse stayed by Ellie’s side as her mother gushed about how work was going and her new audiobook she had downloaded. Something about a single mother meeting a strapping, conveniently single firefighter. Or something. It was on this visit that she brought Ellie a box full of random items she had found laying around the house that she thought she would like. The nurses had searched it before it reached Ellie, so the only contents she found of note were two books, her cell phone with no charger (the nurses would charge it for her), and a small stack of envelopes Ellie tossed aside as junk mail.

When her mother left and she was able to calm herself into reading, Ellie grabbed the stack of letters and began ripping the junk mail in half before tossing it in the trash. The last envelope, however, wasn’t embossed in the same typical type font of credit card companies. Instead, it looked like a handwritten letter, the edges faded slightly and creased with wrinkles.

_“If you're reading this, you must be in dire need of a change. The same thing happened to me, long ago. I'd lost sight of what mattered most in life... real connections with other people and nature. So I dropped everything and moved to the place I truly belong…_

. . . . . . .

I think I’m going to move when I leave here,” Ellie told her doctor, who looked over his clipboard with raised eyebrows.

“This is the first time you’ve mentioned leaving. What brought this on?” Ellie shrugged and handed him her letter that she had been carrying around with her since she opened it.

“This sounds like a good opportunity for you. Are you sure you can handle being somewhere on your own?”

“I think a change in scenery is exactly what I need.” The doctor couldn’t help the small twitch that ticked up the corner of his mouth before speaking.

“Your mother will miss you.”

“I’m sure she will.”

“And that doesn’t bother you?” Ellie sighed and locked eyes with her doctor for the first time since she was admitted.

“Even if it did, I have to do this. For me.” This time the doctor didn’t hide his smile.

“I think, Miss Ellie, this will be the last time we meet. I wish you luck on your future endeavors.” Ellie let a small smile sit on her lips, still holding her eye contact.

Before the end of the day, Ellie and her nurse arranged for a bus to pick her up from her home the next morning. She broke the news to her mother with her nurse at her side, but her mother simply nodded and pursed her lips, telling Ellie that the town was on its last leg and grandpa’s farm had surely turned into a dump after sitting empty for so long. The entire way home, Ellie’s mother made commentary on her audiobook and made horrified gasps every time someone in front of her switched lanes without using a turn signal. She didn’t bat an eye when, for the first time years, Ellie hugged and kissed her goodnight. She went to bed with two small suitcases packed full at the foot of the bed.  

. . . . . . .

Ellie’s alarm brought her out of a dead sleep, her skin slick with sweat. Looking around, she managed a shuddering sigh of relief when she realized where she was. No overbearing parents, no wristbands, no screaming. Just the soft sounds of tree branches scraping against the windows and the faint howl of the wind.

A storm was coming, Ellie knew, but it would pass.


	5. First Impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bad first impressions can be awkward, but what about bad second impressions? Sometimes those can only be remedied by sheer force of will. Featuring a hot breakfast, a quest for Wi-Fi connection, and some rocks.

The remnants of Ellie’s nightmare sat heavy in her chest as she made an attempt to procure a less expensive breakfast. Her cabinets still sat empty; with only a handful of seeds in the ground and a sparse amount of tree saplings that wouldn’t do her any good for at least a couple of seasons, Ellie headed north to a lake she noticed on one of her walks, fishing pole in hand.

Ellie hadn’t fished since she last spent a summer with her grandfather, but she remembered it with fond memories. Her grandfather and the local fisherman, Willy, often spent long hours together with lines cast out into the ocean. Despite her young age, Ellie found she had a knack for it, but had forgotten about it until Willy sent her a letter welcoming her back to Pelican Town and gifted her his old pole.

As she made her way up the hill, she noticed a black-clad figure standing near the edge of the lake. She recognized him as Sebastian from the night before, but seeing him now on his own made him appear much more of a loner than when he was flanked by his two friends. Ellie took a breath and continued her steady walk towards the lake and tried to ignore the slight buckle in her knees.

“I didn’t think vampires came out during the day.” Sebastian jumped slightly in response, not noticing her before she spoke. He said nothing and continued to stare out into the water.

Real smooth. She forced a smile and tried again.

“I’m usually not much of a morning person, either, but something about the lack of smog and police sirens makes it not so bad. Plus, I’m a bit lacking in the food department at the moment, so I figured I’d come try my hand at catching some breakfast.” At this, Sebastian raised his head and eyed her pole dubiously.

“Pool _and_ fishing? You’ll fit right in here.” A small, bitter smile spread across his face before he took one last drag from his cigarette before tossing it on the ground and stomping out the embers with heel of a pair of worn out Converse.  

“Somehow I doubt that. Despite what you saw last night I’m not much of a people person. I used to spend most of my time online, but I guess that’s not much of a thing around here, huh?” Again, Sebastian raised his head a little more. Ellie was oddly pleased with herself for keeping his interest.

“No Wi-Fi yet?” he asked. Ellie blinked.

“What do you mean, _yet_?” I haven’t seen a single cell tower for miles.” Sebastian opened his mouth to speak but not before Robin opened the door and spotted them.

“Ellie! Good morning! I didn’t think I’d see you around this early!”

“Just trying to catch breakfast. I’m still trying to get everything settled and I forgot how long it takes to actually grow food. Robin gasped animatedly, coming up to her and ushering her inside.

“Well you’re more than welcome to come have breakfast with us! You like coffee?”

“Ohmygosh no, really, it’s fine! I don’t want to impose!” Ellie’s attempts at keeping herself outside were quickly thwarted by a determined and surprisingly powerful arm around her shoulders as Robin ignored her protests. “You’ve already done so much for me and I haven’t even been here a week!”

“Come now, don’t be silly. You’re always welcome here. I see you’ve met my son, Sebby. Maru is inside, have you two been acquainted yet?”

“ _MOM.”_ Sebastian’s annoyed voice came from behind them, his feet planted firmly in his spot by the lake.

“Calm down, Sebby, I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” This came with a coy wink in Ellie’s direction as Ellie herself did her best to suppress a smile. “Come get some breakfast with us.” Sebastian ignored her and pulled out his pack of cigarettes, jostling one out into his waiting hand.

“I’m not hungry.”

“At least get some coffee?” Robin turned and gave her son a pair of woefully effective puppy dog eyes and pouted her lip. At that he paused, sighing, and flicked the cigarette back into the box before sulking behind the two of them into the house. Despite the embarrassment of literally walking in on someone else’s breakfast, Ellie was pleased that she had a chance to get to know Sebastian a little more.

Besides, she had to get to the bottom of this Wi-Fi thing.

The inside of Robin’s home as exactly as she imagined: a sturdy cabin with polished, glossy hardwood on every surface and a bustling kitchen that smelled strongly of wheat toast and bacon grease. To her right, Demetrius and a girl Ellie assumed was Maru were already sitting down, heads bent down over some sort of sketch or blueprint.

“Demetrius, Maru, look who’s joining us for breakfast!” Maru’s eyes lit up when she noticed Ellie hanging back by the door and she immediately made a beeline for her with a friendly smile.

“Ellie, right? It’s great to finally meet you! I’m Maru, and this is my dad, Demetrius.”

“Nice to meet you, too.” Ellie spat out before looking over at Demetrius who gave her a polite nod.

“We made each other’s acquaintance last night, hon, but thanks for the introduction.” Maru flushed slightly and laughed with an easiness that was infectious.

“Oh, whelp, that’s everyone then! Come sit down and get something to eat.” Ellie followed Maru to the table and paused when she counted five people and only four chairs.

“Um, but there’s-“                                                                                        

“I’m really not hungry. I’ll be downstairs.” Ellie watched in silence as Sebastian took a mug from Robin and shuffled down to his bedroom.

“Now wait just a minute, Sebastian. We have a guest; you should be upstairs eating breakfast with your family.” Demetrius’ politeness was still present, but the sternness in his voice made Ellie feel like this has happened before. Robin winced to the sound of Sebastian’s basement door slamming closed beneath them.

“Sorry about that, Ellie...” Robin sighed helplessly as she handed Ellie a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon. She suddenly didn’t feel hungry, but thanked Robin for the meal. The remaining members upstairs ate in an awkward silence, broken only by the clinking of tableware.

“So, um, do you guys have Wi-Fi in town? Sebastian mentioned something about It earlier.” Robin perked up at the question, seemingly thankful for the distraction.

“Did you not know? Sebby does a lot of computer work and sets up most of the internet around here. I’m sure he’s in a bit of a sour mood right now, but why don’t you try asking him about it before you go? You guys hung out at the Saloon together, right? I’m sure he won’t mind.”

“No, I had no idea. Are you sure it’ll be okay?” Ellie asked, eyes focused on his bedroom door.

“Oh, don’t let him scare you. He just likes to sulk in there,” Robin responded with a wink and a soft smile that helped to ease the knot in Ellie’s stomach. As Robin stood up to clear the table, Ellie found her feet carrying her down to the plain-looking wooden door at the bottom of a small set of stairs, knuckles on the door before her common sense had a chance to stop her.

“What.” Came an irritated voice. Ellie gulped.

“Um, it’s Ellie. I wanted to ask you something…can I come in?” Ellie had a feeling that the only reason Sebastian opened the door was because he knew his family was still upstairs, but before she knew it, she found herself standing in the center his room: a cinderblock-walled dungeon with rows of full bookshelves and an intimidating-looking computer setup on the far wall, the fan on the computer tower the only thing breaking the silence between them.

“Can I help you?” he asked after a minute, visibly annoyed that he was forced to let her in. She stared at the floor as she dug a small hole in the gray rug on the floor with the toe of her shoe.

“Well, um..I…you said something about Wi-Fi earlier and I was wondering-“ She let the words trail off into the silence before continuing. “Actually, you know, the prospect of WI-FI is nice, but mostly I just wanted to say I’m sorry about what happened earlier. I understand having a parent you don’t get along with.” Ellie surprised herself with the frankness of her comment. Maybe it was the way Sebastian seemed to shrink into himself when Demetrius confronted him. Perhaps it was the empty, tired look in his eyes that Ellie recognized as the same one she saw in the mirror every morning at the hospital. Regardless, the last thing she expected was the flash of anger that clouded his features.

“Yeah. Whatever. Is that all you wanted to say?” Ellie felt like she had been slapped. He seemed friendly enough last night at the saloon, but the person in front of her now was quickly coming across as as cold and unfriendly.

“Uh, yeah, I guess that’s it…um…I’m sorry I bothered you. I’ll see you Friday, then?”

“Sure.”

Ellie made her way out of Robin’s house as cheerfully as she could muster, thanking her for the food and offering to help with the cleanup before her tears gave her away. The walk home seemed much longer than it was that morning, and she had all but forgotten her fishing gear that she had left on the edge of the Lake. By the time she finally reached her door, she could barely see and she managed to clip her hip on the large shipping container outside of her house. She limped pathetically inside, simultaneously cursing her bad luck and laughing at the absurdity of the extra salt in the wound.

Without any distractions, Ellie’s mind began to play her last interaction with Sebastian on loop, her anxiety spiking after each rerun. What happened to the good-humored pool player that Sam seemed to like so well? Certainly she just caught him on a bad day. A fight with a family member can be stressful, she noted. As she changed into her pajamas—a cheap pair of cotton shorts with an elastic waistband that had long since given out and a band t-shirt from high school—Ellie tried her best to recall any details in Sebastian’s room that she could use for the sake not-as-awkward conversation the next time she ran into him.

It mostly came back in a blur of dime store fantasy novels, old comic books, and a precarious stack of what looked like technology textbooks with titles she couldn’t even begin to understand. After a moment it came to her: a small collection of precious stones sitting in a half-circle on top of on of his bookcases. Ellie had never found an interest in gemstones, but she could still appreciate the way the ones Sebastian had still seemed to sparkle brilliantly in the dim lighting of his basement abode. She recognized a piece of amethyst and a rose quartz as big as her fist. As if on cue, she remembered a cave system not far from Sebastian’s house, as well as the strange altercation with a man named Merlon, who had gifted her a sword right before she decided to charge into the caves with her rusty scythe a few days prior. With her eyes beginning to adjust to the absolute darkness that seemed to be the norm for the No Stop Lights or Traffic Light Pollution Pelican Town, she could see the gleaming metal blade sitting on her kitchen table where she had left it. It occurred to her briefly that she might be overreacting to what was probably nothing more than an off day for Sebastian, but she decided that she didn’t care. Pelican Town was her chance for a fresh start, and she refused to pass up a potential friendship. She also decided that the next time she saw Alex she would try her best to give him a second chance. Maybe.


End file.
